A Purple Garden

purple tiger roses

It’s purple and it’s TIGER why the heck wouldn’t I want this thing?


Purple is my favorite color, as anyone who has known me for more than five minutes will know. So when I saw these fabulous purple tiger roses, I just had to have them. But, not content to limit myself to a single purple flower, I also bought this one:
dark purple rose

Look it’s a ~mysterious purple~ rose


And a wisteria as well…
wisteria

Been wanting one of these babies for AGES


And then I got to thinking that I already have a huge rosemary plant that is covered with purple flowers, and then I saw some seeds for a really cool purple columbine, so I bought those as well. (Though while I was outside planting the purple tiger rosebush they mysteriously vanished from the porch. Stupid wind blew them off somewhere. I hope I can find another packet.)

I bought a purple clematis too, but as I got that from Walmart, I don’t have a convenient picture to snark from their website, so you’ll just have to wait until it blooms. Which might be a while, since I have yet to plant the dang thing.

I’m wondering now if it’s too late to plant irises, because of the purple flowers, those are some of the nicest. I did get a mixed bag of anemone bulbs, not all purple, probably, but the pinks and reds should make a nice contrast, or maybe I’ll pot them and just transplant the purple ones in the garden.

Anyway, that’s a thing I’m attempting. It’ll probably be slow going since I have a bit of a black thumb and am almost incable of getting out of bed at a decent hour anymore–it is just slightly miraculous that I managed to get up early enough to plant the rosebush today. (I also bought and planted a Japanese Loquat just because it was there and sounded cool.) Updates as they happen! (Hopefully!)

So…I bought myself a hat?

I am becoming ever more housebound, between taking my writing seriously* and the burgeoning anxiety/depression issues, but a few weeks ago, my sister did manage to get me out of the house on a shopping trip. We went to a craft store, a book store, and Target.

At Target there was a hat.

My BFF promptly named it my sherbet hat, and so it shall be called for ever and ever

I loved it at first sight. The colors are so cute! I made the cardinal mistake of putting the hat on and wearing while I followed my sister around the store. It felt odd at first, but then I forgot about it except when I was walking fast enough to make the beads bounce against the brim in the most satisfying way.

Of course I ended up buying it.

Now, I am not a hat person. Hats make me feel like I should be trying for some sort of fashion, and my fashion is generally ‘whatever is comfortable and doesn’t make me look ten pounds overweight’ and ‘sandals when the weather approves.’ In Texas, it approves most of the time. I wore them today when I took my dog for a walk.

I also wore my sherbet hat for the first time too, because one of the reasons I was able to persuade myself it wasn’t a self-indulgent waste of money was that I sort of needed one for our walks. Texas is a big, open place, and even more so in the winter, when all the trees are hanging out in their birthday suits, and the sun is free to shine right in your eyes when you’re walking in the direction of the sunset on a short January evening. The sunlight shining through the brim was very nice, all golden through the pinkish-red of the hat itself. I am satisfied with my purchase, and am not inclined to castigate myself for spending the money.

*Hey, J.M., how is that going anyway “Oh, fine, I felt really good this week despite being tired as hell, so I’m almost done with Ch34, (one scene left *crosses fingers*) and not terribly discouraged even though the mess my country has gotten itself into since November sent me into a Spiral of Doom™ that put me two and half months back on my schedule and now AFWT probably won’t be released until autumn at earliest” she says while totally not sobbing in a corner.

No, it’s fine, really, I promise. I feel good today, anyway, so I’m going to make the most of that while it lasts.

Reading Roundup for 2016 and Some Highlights!

I basically spent the last two month of 2016 in a semi-comatose state, inhaling the fluffiest fluff possible to sooth my raging anxiety and depression. *gestures at the general state of the world* Fell off all my social media, barely left the house for anything except work…yeah, it was bad.

But I now have a bunch of books and other media to talk about!

TV stuff first!

My BFF got me into Supergirl. I had seen a couple of episodes and not been terribly impressed–the acting is…not great (it’s a CW comic book show, duh) but the characters are actually adorable when taken in context, and that counts for a lot with me. *squees at how adorable Winn is* *pinches Kara’s cheeks* And I love how much time is devoted to the sister relationship between Kara and Alex.

I watched the entire first season on DVD, but it was too late to really get into season two, since I had missed like, all the new episodes. I’ll probably binge it when it hits DVD on Netflix. I much prefer to consume my visual media that way anyway, since I tend to check out of shows after a few weeks when I try to watch them on a week to week basis.

Then I had to start watching the Flash, because Supergirl got me jonesing for more adorkanerds, and basically the entire cast of Flash is adorkanerds. I’m about halfway through the first season–I got stuck in an ebook loop and forgot to finish the second disc and the first one got buried under a mountain of crap on my desk so I forgot to send it back.

Oops. Oh, well, on to the books!

New stuff first. I have been a really big fan of Patricia C. Wrede’s Enchanted Forest Chronicles (Dealing With Dragons, Searching for Dragons, Calling on Dragons, Talking to Dragons) since I was a kid, and I recently saw a recommendation for her Cecelia and Kate novels.

In Sorcery & Cecelia, the two cousins have been inseparable since girlhood. But in 1817, Kate goes to London to make her debut into English society, leaving Cecelia behind to fight boredom in her small country town. While visiting the Royal College of Wizards, Kate stumbles on a plot to destroy a beloved sorcerer—and only Cecelia can help her save him.

They are super good despite being told in a series of letters, which is possibly my least favorite literary device ever. Regency romances with a magical twist are one of my favorite things, as I have recently discovered. I devoured the first one, Sorcery and Cecelia and then the next week the second, The Grand Tour. I’m saving The Mislaid Magician for a day when I need something suitably Fluff.

Seanan McGuire’s October Daye series is also pretty good, even if she’s a bit mean to her characters.

The world of Faerie never disappeared; it merely went into hiding, continuing to exist parallel to our own. Secrecy is the key to Faerie’s survival—but no secret can be kept forever, and when the fae and mortal worlds collide, changelings are born.

Outsiders from birth, these half-human, half-fae children spend their lives fighting for the respect of their immortal relations. Or, in the case of October “Toby” Daye, rejecting it completely. After getting burned by both sides of her heritage, Toby has denied the fae world, retreating into a “normal” life. Unfortunately for her, Faerie has other ideas…

The murder of Countess Evening Winterrose, one of the secret regents of the San Francisco Bay Area, pulls Toby back into the fae world. Unable to resist Evening’s dying curse, Toby must resume her former position as knight errant to the Duke of Shadowed Hills and begin renewing old alliances that may prove her only hope of solving the mystery…before the curse catches up with her.

I finished the first two books, and the third is on my shopping list. Probably gonna hit up the used book stores for this series from now on though. (I really do feel like eight dollars is too much for an ebook when it’s part of a really long series like this. Hey, publishers, I really do spend more freely on ebooks when they’re five bucks or less. I’m saying this as a person who has spent a truly ridiculous amount of money on ebooks this last six months or so, I’m just saying.)

Speaking of inexpensive books, I loved Harper Lee’s Tyack and Frayne series. They’re novella length, and even though I’m not a huge fan of the insta-love trope, the subsequent installments dealt with the development of the relationship so well I stopped caring about that.

Gideon Frayne has spent his whole working life as a policeman in the village of Dark on Bodmin Moor. It’s not life in the fast lane, but he takes it very seriously, and his first missing-child case is eating him alive. When his own boss sends in a psychic to help with the case, he’s gutted – he’s a level-headed copper who doesn’t believe in such things, and he can’t help but think that the arrival of clairvoyant Lee Tyack is a comment on his failure to find the little girl.

There is a good balance between the relationship and the mysteries, with the two becoming more intertwined as the series progresses, and Harper Fox has a way with language, and with making the setting come to life. I’ve read a few of her other books, but this series is the best so far.

Another really good series is Melissa Scott and Lisa A. Barnett’s Novels of Astrieant. It’s a historical mystery/fantasy/mystery–quite a genre mix there. The first one is Point of Hopes.

Nicolas Rathe is a pointsman, a dedicated watchman in the great city of Astreiant. During the annual trade fair, with a city filled with travelers and merchants, someone is stealing children. The populace is getting angry and frightened and convinced that a foreigner must be to blame. Rathe calls on the aid of both an out-of-work soldier, the handsome Philip Eslingen, and the necromancer Istre b’Estorr. The art of astrology is a very real power in the kingdom and plays as much a role in politics as greed and intrigue. Rathe finds himself struggling to find the children before a major astrological event brings about catastrophe.

These are long books, with ultra-detailed narratives–which doesn’t bother me, I actually like that. The worldbuilding is spot on, medieval Venetian-inspired with a matriarchal society, the magic very skillfully woven in.

Melissa Scott also cowrites another series of historical fantasy mysteries with Amy Griswold, this one Victorian, starting with Death by Silver.

His practice newly established, metaphysician Ned Mathey can’t afford to turn away any clients. But the latest Londoner to seek Ned’s magical aid gives him pause: Mr Edgar Nevett, an arrogant banker, is the father of the bully who made Ned’s life hell at boarding school. Nevertheless, Ned accepts the commission to ensure the Nevett family silver bears no ancient or modern curses, and then prepares to banish the Nevett family to unpleasant memory again. Until Edgar Nevett is killed by an enchanted silver candlestick—one of the pieces Ned declared magically harmless.

Calling on his old school friend Julian Lynes—private detective and another victim of the younger Nevett—Ned races to solve the murder, clear the stain on his professional reputation, and lay to rest the ghosts of his past.

It’s got the same long, ultra-detailed style–again, not complaining. The magic is really cool and sort of scientific-ish, with complicated written spells and detailed rules about what works properly.

One more series that I really liked was Alexis Hall’s Kate Kane, Paranormal Investigator.

My name’s Kate Kane, and when an eight-hundred-year-old vampire prince came to me with a case, I should have told her no. But I’ve always been a sucker for a femme fatale.

It always goes the same way. You move too fast, you get in too deep, and before you know it, someone winds up dead. Last time it was my partner. This time it could be me. Yesterday a werewolf was murdered outside the Velvet, the night-time playground of one of the most powerful vampires in England. Now half the monsters in London are at each other’s throats, and the other half are trying to get in my pants. The Witch Queen will protect her own, the wolves are out for vengeance, and the vampires are out for, y’know, blood.

I’ve got a killer on the loose, a war on the horizon, and a scotch on the rocks. It’s going to be an interesting day.

It’s basically the standard urban fantasy setup–vampires, faeries, werewolves, mages–except the cast is like, 90% lesbians. Kate Kane is half fae, and her magic is really neat and creepy, and the first book was just hilarious with her snarky sense of humor. I really hope the third book comes out eventually…

I think that’s it for my recent reads (or rather, the things I’ve read since my last roundup, anyway, you know, way back in *mumble mumble*). Probably my favorite series (aside from Tyack and Frayne) I’ve read this year is K.J. Charles’ Society of Gentlemen. The covers are, frankly, hideous, and that put me off trying them for a long time despite enjoying the author’s previous series pretty well. But the writing is so good–the historical detail is phenomenal, giving a real sense of the setting that was sorely lacking in some of the Regency series I’ve read–politics, fashion, slang. Despite being fairly short books, they create a detailed world and well-fleshed out characters. Since this is a problem for me and my multiples-of-hundred-thousand-words-long manuscripts, I’ve reread these books several times to try to get a sense of how she accomplishes this. Hopefully it’ll rub off on my future attempts. (Not that I’m going to attempt to cut down AFWT at all. I’m going to write that exactly how I want, and how I want is ridiculously long, apparently. lol)

A Bit of Halloween Flash Fiction For You

Karen plunged a knife into the soft and pliant flesh and cut a clean, round hole. “Gosh, this is gonna make a mess,” she said, pulling the top off the pumpkin. She was surprised to find, instead of seeds and pulpy orange goo, a lot of fuzzy black mold. “Damn it,” she said, “I paid four bucks for this thing!”

She threw the pumpkin away and washed her hands, wondering what to do in the two hours she had left before work. “Guess I’ll watch some TV,” she said. She flipped through the channels, but there was never anything on in the afternoon. She decided to put in a movie–after she got something to eat. For some reason she was starving, even though she’d just finished breakfast.

She decided to fix a bowl of ice cream. It took a while. She kept dropping the spoons on the floor. “Why am I so uncoordinated today?” she grumbled. Her hands looked terribly pale. She hoped she wasn’t getting sick.

She shuffled back into the living room, adding lethargy to her list of symptoms. It seemed like a lot of trouble to cross the room to select a DVD, so she plopped down on the couch and stared listlessly at the screen. A talk show was on, lots of dysfunctional people screaming about baby-daddies and drugs. She had been watching, ignoring her ice cream, though staring at the host’s shiny bald head, she was hungrier than ever.

After a few minutes, the show was interrupted by a special news bulletin. “A mysterious fungus has been reported as causing mass outbreaks of mind-altering behavior this Halloween. Symptoms include a lack of coordination, extreme hunger and what has been described as ‘brain fog’. If you see anyone exhibiting these symptoms, please report it to the FEMA Heath officials at the following numbers. FEMA director W. Craig Fugate is cautioning citizens to stay indoors until the cause of this massive outbreak can be identified and dealt with. If you absolutely must leave your home, wear a helmet as a precaution, as the fungus has been linked to outbreaks of violence, including infected persons attempting to bite passersby on the head and face.”

Karen stared at the screen in dismay. “Are they trying to tell me I’m turning into a frickin zombie?” No wonder the cats were hiding on top of the bookshelf.

She sulked on the couch for a while. Finally, she had to get up and get ready for work. After all, convenience stores never close, not even during a zombie apocalypse.

It wasn’t all bad, she decided. There were a few customers she actually wouldn’t mind meeting today.

(c) 2011 J.M. Cowan

Totally not posting from work *coughs loudly*

I went to get my phone battery changed. It turned into a mild adventure. Which is to say I am now a bit stressed out. 

I got to the battery place and they did have a battery, fortunately. Two of them. When my mom went, that had told her there was one but they were wrong. Twice. It was not an encouraging story. The girl took down my information and went to replace the battery. She went behind a little high walled kiosk thing and I could hear her making sounds that were also not terribly encouraging. There was a loud adhesive-tearing sound. Then she brought my phone out and plugged it in because apparently these batteries do not come charged? 

And we waited for the phone to come on.

And we waited. 

And we waited.

And ten minutes of incredible awkwardness later she finally decided she would try the other one. Meanwhile my stomach is doing that stress thing. You know. Cold knives in the gut sort of thing. This gets worse when she brings my phone back out and we wait for it to come back on. She is holding the original battery that came with the phone now and it…does not look viable anymore. She broke the capacitor on it taking it out so if the second battery didn’t work I was basically out a phone.

And we waited. 

My stomach: D:

And then, thank all the gods and spirits* it actually started. It has been working just fine since yesterday. Not great battery life but that’s probably the iOS 10 update’s fault. Apple does not really believe in backwards compatibility. :/

*I love how after working on this book for a year and a half I keep catching myself swearing in character. I expect any day now to get a Look from one of my customers for saying ‘fire and water‘ instead of ‘dang it’

So the battery is going out on my phone

It currently only lasts about five minutes unplugged. I’ve had this phone for about three years, I think? An iPhone 5c. It was free with my contract renewal, and it’s been getting slower anyway, so I thought I’d go and see about a new one.

Went to Verizon, and my options, as told to me by the guy behind the counter, are to pay full price outright for a phone (lolno), or pay monthly payments until it’s payed for (it’d take two years to pay for the damn thing). So I said, “You don’t do contract renewal pricing anymore?”

And he said they did but my bill would go up by twenty dollars a month.

So I said that was the most ridiculous thing I’d ever heard of, who would pay more to be trapped in a contract for two years? And he said it was to keep the non-contracted customers.

But…you don’t want to keep the ones who are willing to be contracted? Like, I could *switch* phone companies right now and get a cheaper phone? Big business logic?!??!!? (Also, they wanted to charge me fifty dollars more for the phone than Apple would have if I bought it outright?!)

I know, I know. “Stop wasting time whining about phones and finish the dang book already.”

I am about halfway done with the revision, though. I…severely doubt I will be able to finish before the new year, unless my muse lights a serious fire under my @$$. I was looking at Ch12 today, and Extremely Large chunks of it will have to be rewritten from scratch now–I will never, ever write another book without figuring out all the worldbuilding details first again–I have basically halted work on my side project (tentatively titled ‘Golden Wolf’) for just that reason. (It’s an asexual romance with wolves who can turn into people, not werewolves, set in small town Texas. I’m planning to do a research trip for it for my birthday, to Boerne, which is tentatively the setting. Haven’t decided whether it will be set in the real town or a fictional version.)

I also figured out the emotional arc for the sp/ace romance. I had been stumped for a conflict, and stupidly ignored that it was right there in the first scene that I live-tweeted last year, because I thought it was going to be a much different story than the one it is supposed to be. Oops. Oh well, I still have a deal of research to do for it anyway. I thought of writing it for NaNoWriMo this year, but I think I’ll actually just work on AFWT instead, see if I can’t finish it before the end of the year. And on that note, I’ll go work on Ch12, but only for an hour, because I have a ton of stuff to do tomorrow, chief of which is going to get the battery replaced on my phone because *makes rude gesture at Verizon*

Reading Roundup!

I had been having trouble getting into new books for a couple of years now. It’s partly the depression/anxiety/ADD thing, and partly a lack of time when I’m working on a project that got as big as my current WIP.

But recently, I started reading as voraciously as I used to as a kid again. I think it’s the sheer convenience of reading on my phone that’s done it. I do not own an e-reader, and I can’t see myself buying one, ever, but the ability to hold an entire library in my back pocket has done wonders for my reading habit. The small screen size and adjustable fonts help negate my tendency to zone out in the middle of a page of text, and being able to change to a black background with white text is so much easier on my eyes for some reason. Plus, it’s my phone, which I keep in my pocket, which makes it easy to pick up around the house and while waiting in line at the bank and other such quiet moments that arise.

I may also have developed a terrible, ADD tendency to switch between writing, reading and Twitter every five minutes. In case you were wondering why it’s taking me so much longer to get these chapter revisions done.* -_-;

My recent binge started with a special price on the ebook for Gail Carriger’s Prudence, which I had been curious about. I liked Soulless, but my interest in the series sort of tapered out after the third book because I was on a Serious Stories kick then, and these books are basically All Fluff All The Time even when she’s trying to be sort of serious, but now I am on a huge Fluff Kick because reasons. (Although I generally consume my Fluff in comics format because I still prefer texty type stories to be dense and long and involved.) Anyway, Prudence was a solid three-star read for me, and I’m just waiting for the price of the sequel to go down so I can read it. I really need to finish the Finishing School series too. The first book was decently entertaining.

Then while I was browsing the ebook recommendations from Amazon, I ran across a title that seemed familiar, and ended up binging on the first three books in Lynn Flewelling’s Nightrunner series, which were recommended to me by my best friend ages ago and which I promptly forgot about because my brain is like a sieve. I actually had to force myself to stop reading them at book three because I was not getting any work done on my own book. Also because the ability to immediately buy the next book in a series is a dangerous thing for my credit card balance.

I might as well have finished the series, though, because I still ended up buying a bunch more books. The ones that I liked the best were the Cadeleonian series by Ginn Hale, Lord of the White Hell and Champion of the Scarlet Wolf. These are just good books, wonderful character interaction and enthralling worldbuilding and plotting. I particularly liked the magic in the Scarlet Wolf books.

I’ve read about half a dozen other books, but nothing I cared for enough to write about. I’m going to start trying to tweet more about what I’m reading over on my Official Author Twitter, since I don’t have much else to say on it. I forget it’s there most of the time, oops. ;p

*actually that’s because I keep having to go back and forth between chapters and reread everything eight billion times and make hard decisions about plot and character relationships and this book is already at 80K words and I’m ONLY ON CHAPTER EIGHT gods damn it why do I do this to myself

Revisions Hell: One Month In

Anyone who has ever heard me talk about writing has heard me say this but in case you missed it: I hate revising.

That said, I think I’m doing okay this time? I am exhausted and frustrated and I keep finding really stupid mistakes and I can’t make up my mind about certain details, but…I like the shape the story is taking? Though good freaking lord, will I be so happy when I finally get to the midpoint in the book where I had everything mostly figured out and only need to correct minor continuity changes and typos.

And add Feelings.

That part is probably not going to get easier.

I’m moving along at a decent clip, if not a great one–about one chapter per week. There was a lot of overtime at my job in May, which puts me blessedly ahead financially *knocks on wood* but kind of killed me creatively. I am still recovering from the exhaustion. I know this because I started another side story idea, and have written almost two chapters of it. -_-; That’s bad because it’s literally all spoilers for some important backstory and therefore not something anyone, even my beta reader, can read for a long damn time. I have managed to persuade myself it is okay to spend time on this because it’s bonus material for a future Patreon or whatever thing. Really I should be finishing the first chapter of the second/third book (still haven’t made up my mind on this point) if I’m going to be writing new material, but eh.

Anyway! My agenda today:

1: Clean my frickin house. After spending several weeks in thrall to borderline depressive anxiety episode, my home is a disaster. I hit a wall Monday, hard. Got home from work and spent nearly the entire day in bed because I just could not make myself get up. I felt marginally better Tuesday, but still too tired. But today, I really need to straighten things up.

2: Do that massive reread of the rough draft I’ve been putting off. It started because of the overtime thing, but then it was just because I landed head first in the revising of the first few chapters, and that was involved let me tell you, what with all the new scenes and trying to figure out how to describe the magic stuff more accurately and changing my mind about every tiny detail because who are you talking to? Me, duh.

3: Kidding, I’m not going to have time for anything else, did I tell you how long this book is? It’s frickin long. I had to do a reread of the first four chapters before sending Ch4 to my dear beta reader which took a good two hours. Four chapters. Two hours. I am too long winded. I have accepted this about myself.

Hopefully everyone else will too.

It’s a rough draft!

I have finished the rough draft of my third novel! I am extremely tired now, because this baby clocks in at nearly 265 thousand words! I started this particular book in 2013, as a self-indulgent fantasy romance idea while I was struggling with my previous project, the sadly neglected Firecat. I wrote about ten thousand words before leaving off, but last summer, I was looking though the random files back up to my phone and found it, and thought, “hey, this ain’t half bad, why’d I stop?” And then started writing again.

I have never written so intensely in my life. I used to write at a pace of about 300-500 words a day, and not every day, or even particularly regularly. That was mostly due to problems with anxiety and depression, which made it hard to focus and harder to like anything I produced. But I’ve gotten better about this stuff in the last year, and I guess that lit a spark, because my daily average word count is much closer to 900 words a day, and lately I’m having days where I break 1,500 (on a work day!), or up in the 2-3 thousand on my days off.

Anyway, the book is done, and it is a BEAST. I intended this book originally as a one-shot romance thing, to see if I could write one. It’s not a genre that gets a lot of play from me, since I never really felt it much? But realizing my instinctive rejection of the trappings of romance were a direct result of being almost entirely asexual/aromantic and unable to express this fact for the first 28 years of my life because the vocabulary just wasn’t there really opened me up to the enjoyment of a really good ship, which is…weird, when I stop to think about it sometimes, but whatever?

*shrugs*

So that was the original intention, anyway. Somehow along the way it turned into an epic fantasy in an mid-industrial magic setting? I got really into the setting and the magic and the worldbuilding, and it just sort of happened that way, and the one-shot idea just kept getting longer because I can never seem to be able to gauge exactly how long it’s going to take me to get from point A to point B when I’m writing, and now it’s going to be a trilogy, or possibly a quartet (is that the right word? I have no idea what the term for a four-book series is) because at this point I am seriously considering chopping the first book in half. I won’t know for sure until I’ve done a full read through and fixed the first half (needs a lot of worldbuilding and magic system detailing added) and fixing up the side plot, which I didn’t think up until almost two thirds through the book because I did the thing I always do and got WAY too attached to one of the side characters and had to expand the scope of his story in the book. *BIG sigh*

I love to make things hard on myself, don’t I. But I’m much more satisfied with this idea than the original one. Mostly because it is chock full of my own preferences: Multiple asexual/aromantic relationships! Magical bonding practices! Characters being snarky at each other but also Talking about their Feelings a lot! Epic levels of angst! A protagonist who is going to get called a Mary Sue by SO MANY PEOPLE–I can’t wait. There also ended up being a bunch of kids in this book and I am just as surprised as you are by this fact? Like, I guess I ought to have expected that when I made the setting a school?

*epic shrug*

Okay, so my goal is to be done revising the first book by the end of summer! Maybe sooner if I do end up making it into two books? Regardless, I’m hoping to release the first book early next year. There is a website! There is…nothing there yet! But it exists!

I am crossing my fingers really hard because historically, my record of revising things is 0/2. But I have a really good feeling about this one!

Notes on my other projects! I am planning to start writing the sp/ace romance soon too. I don’t know if I’ll be able to work on both projects at once, and my current project will have to take priority, but I want to try. Comics…are on the back burner for now. We are getting into the busy time of year at work and I just don’t have the energy for art things right now. At some point I am going to seriously consider tightening my belt and getting a part time job so I’ll have time to be more creative, now that I’m not a hyper-nervous, depressed wreck of a human being. I still need to save more money before I can consider that though. Fortunately a side effect of spending all my time writing is that I have no time to go out and spend money anymore, so…soon? ha ha…

Took a writing break

Wednesday because I just got off a three day long depressive anxiety episode thing. Could not concentrate on anything to save my life. I was not allowed to write anything before work. I cleaned my kitchen instead, and it felt good, because it really, really needed it.

It was a quiet day at work, surprising for a Wednesday–usually that’s the day everyone is grumpy, or running around like the proverbial headless chicken. I broke my break to jot down a few lines between customers, and ended up thinking about the meeting story of two characters who are only referenced in the book, one of whom is already dead before the story starts (not a spoiler, the main character finds this out very early in the first chapter) and the other of whom does not show up in person until the third book.

And now I have to write this story. -_-; (Eventually. Not now. Even if I wrote it now, I wouldn’t be able to release it any time soon because it wouldn’t make much sense outside the context of the novels.)

BUT…I, uh…may have already jotted down some sections of dialogue? And made up some cultural details to work into the story, since it takes place mostly in a different country than the book…and decided some backstory stuff for both the characters that I hadn’t bothered to think up yet? Oops.

*bangs head against keyboard*

How did what was supposed to be a one-off story idea turn into this giant, epic thing with half a dozen spin off stories? No, don’t answer that, I suspect it has something to do with the fact that I can’t help overthinking everything.